Show, not Tell-- Exploring Author's Craft

"Standing in the doorway, illuminated by the shivering flames in Lupin’s hand, was a cloaked figure that towered to the ceiling. Its face was completely hidden beneath its hood. Harry’s eyes darted downward, and what he saw made his stomach contract. There was a hand protruding from the cloak and it was glistening, grayish, slimy-looking, and scabbed, like something dead that had decayed in water. . . ."

-Harry Potter, The Prisoner of Azkaban

Whew!  Talk about character description: "glistening, grayish, slimy-looking, and scabbed"  Adjectives GALORE!

This reminds me of the "Tell -- Show" strategy I used to use with my 5th-grade students (see this link to find this lesson)

The task as a writer is to get all of those important details into the mind of the reader.  For this activity, have students take ONE sentence from their story and place it on the left side of a two-column chart.  On the right hand side, place the heading title, "what your reader needs to know."

Here's an example:

So, instead of saying, "A hand popped up" The author (J.K. Rowling) builds the image though lots of details.

In a WW format, students can pick one average sentence from their writing, complete the "Tell-Show" activity and build an amazing sentence.  This is a great step to later refer to in the revising stage of writing.  During revising with future drafts, students may need to pick 2 sentences, for example, to improve using the "Tell-Show" strategy.

I look forward to discovering more of J.K. Rowling's craft for details as I continue through Book Three in the Harry Potter series!

Petrified

Petrified

Definition: So frightened one is unable to move.  Terrified.

Yes, there is a dark force lurking at Hogwarts-- the air of Syltherin--and no one knows who are what is causing students to become petrified, turning to stone. This is due to the Chamber of Secrets, who according to legend, can only be opened by the air of Syltherin.   The latest victim, Hermione Granger.  When something petrifies Harry's best friend, things are getting serious.  

I'm in the thick of the plot and clues are starting to unveil.  One big question rolling around in my brain relates to Harry's belonging.  Does he really belong in the  Gryffindor, or, was he truly meant for Slytherin.  It was the Slytherin house the sorting hat recommended. The hat felt strongly of his connection to the Slytherin house.  Some are saying Harry is the air of Slytherin.  We learned up to this point in the story that he can speak in Snake tongue.  This along with more and more connections are being shared between Harry's wizard abilities and Voldemort's (the "you know who" evil wizard!)  

Is Harry the yen and Voldemort the yang?  This is a strong internal struggle for Harry at this point in the story.  We want to root for Harry and we know he represents good, but why is he so connected to the Slytherin house? Without knowledge of about his family (since they all died when he was born), we just aren't sure . . . .yet.    

And, another question at this point in the story  . . . why isn't anyone considering Voldemort as the one who opened the Chamber of Secrets????  Sometimes I want to give Harry and his friends a few tips on who to consider!  Seriously!  

I am nearly finished with this novel and anticipate much will happen here in the next few chapters.  

Dr. K